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Yes, I really am
this bad at drawing.

And coding.

unstable web design
Worried alien with long arms holding the block up

See the desktop version of this site in all its animated glory!

This is the kind of website that would normally have a photo and a short bio, isn’t it?

planet earth

This is what I look like from space

Click on the globe or the button to zoom in 250,000 miles to see where I live.

Honestly, I feel like that would have looked a lot more slick if I knew how to do it in Google Earth.

alien with binoculars
x-ray of skullHomer Simpson

Often ignored, Radiographers are one of my key audience demographics.

This is me – I’m easily recognised as I’m told that my parietal bones are particularly smooth.

Can you believe that I haven’t received a Dribbble invite yet?

OK, last one – this is what I will look like when I have been sent to prison by a military court for a crime I didn't commit, and I promptly escape from a maximum security stockade... by posting myself home.

I'm getting a bit claustrophobic in here so please let me out...

Ouch, shit!

Why would you do that?

I was pointing to the box-cutter at the bottom of the page

What kind of a maniac cuts open a box with a big knife like that when they know there’s a person inside?

Photo of Ben and family

Okay fine.

Obligatory photo of me and the family.

I don't know whose family they are.

They just asked me to take this selfie as I have longer arms.

I bet you feel even worse now I’m not just a faceless person in a box?

The least you can do is explain yourself to my bereaved family:

Well, that was funawkward.

What is the point of this site?

I'm glad you asked.

Where to now?

alien with binoculars
planet earth
box cutter sign

Good for you if you got this far down the page in search of something safe to open that box with.

box cutter

This site is part of the weird wide web-ring